Real Woman Real Journey (RWRJ) Therapy for Women 


 Canadian Women's Wellness Network              Réseau Canadien du Bien-Etre des Femmes

About the Author
Lola Sholagbade, M.A. C.C.C Counsellor & Psychotherapist at Quiet Waters
Lola Sholagbade is counsellor & psychotherapist at Quiet Waters Counselling & Psychotherapy in Ottawa. She obtained her Masters in Counselling & Spirituality from University of Ottawa. Her practice is based on the Biblical principles of care and compassion and she has a passion for helping women with self-esteem and body image issues. 
Upcoming Events at Quiet Waters

Self-Esteem Psycho-Educational Group


Fearfully & Wonderfully Made!

By: Lola Sholagbade, M.A. C.C.C Counsellor & Psychotherapist at Quiet Waters

Published: March 19th 2014

Fearfully & Wonderfully Made! From time immemorial, women have dealt with image issues. Despite the strides women have made over the years, this is one area where it seems no stride is being made at all. Research consistently shows that majority of women are not satisfied with our appearance. This is made further evident by the obvious lucrative business of reconstructive surgery. The average woman thinks she is too short, too fat, she is too light, or too dark, her thighs are too big, her abs are not tight enough, and so on and so forth. According to a poll by dove, only 4% of women consider themselves beautiful, to this effect, the average woman is convinced that if she could only change any of the things that she is not satisfied with she will be perfect.

However, the problem with this is that changing anything will not necessarily guarantee satisfaction. As a matter of fact, research has shown that as many as have changed things about themselves are even more unsatisfied about the change and go to the extent of performing more changes, for some, once the change is complete they find something else to change which then leads to a vicious cycle of changing one thing or the other about oneself.

As someone who struggled with image issues growing up, it is easy to empathize with people who have the same struggles. I went through a phase in my life where I preferred to wear pants rather than skirts, long sleeves rather than short sleeves because I felt I was way too skinny. Those were difficult years, but I have come to a place where I celebrate me just as I am. I have come to accept the truth of God's word that if he wanted me to be a different way, He would have made me a different way. His word tells me that I was formed in His image and that I am fearfully and wonderfully made (Gen. 1:26; Ps. 139:14). This tells me that I am no accident, more importantly and especially the way I am is no accident, I am exactly as I was intended to be - no more, no less.

As one fine woman succinctly put it, "God created us to convey the distinctive imprint of His divine nature to a world often blinded to His existence", and I believe it is the very divine nature of God to create a world of diversity through us as humans in various shapes and sizes to first and foremost delight Him and secondly to witness to His existence. So, dearest reading this, as you go about your day and your life and in celebration of International Women's Day, remember that you are a real woman on a real journey. Above all else, remember that you are created in the image of Him who made you, you are fearfully and wonderfully made and more than anything you are perfect just as you are! Be Well!

Lola Sholagbade, M.A. C.C.C Counsellor & Psychotherapist @ Quiet Waters